Tuesday, 12 June 2012

ELLE Magazine: Edited by the Interns

ELLE Magazine, I am ready.

I've spent the last three years practising my best Miranda Priestly in preparation for this moment. I think I've pretty much perfected the ice-cold-bitch-who-won't-take-your-crap demeanour that you need to be a top magazine editor. At least that's what Ugly Betty and The Devil Wears Prada have taught me. I've got it sussed that all it takes is a raised eyebrow and a few sarcastic comments. As such, I've been spending my time working out a few soul-destroying lines to put my pathetic workers into their rightful places.
Here are a few of my best:

"I'd rather gauge my eyes out with those rings than look at them any longer"
"You're actually pitching tartan to me? Pass me a scotch."
"If I see one more floral pattern I'm going to floor all of you."

My favourite is the last one. Of course all those lines are pretty context-dependent but they're bound to happen at some point. 

Okay, they could use some work. 
I'm completely kidding, of course. In fact, I'd probably be more Rebecca Bloomwood than Miranda Priestly:

My life on film.

Anyway, the point of this post is to let all of you budding fashion journalists know that ELLE are offering an amazing opportunity for interns to edit the October issue of their magazine. There are ten positions available; The Editor, Fashion Photographer, Fashion Editor, Art Editor, Features Editor, News Editor, Beauty Editor, Hair Stylist, Make-Up Artist and Celebrity Editor. For each one there's a different task to undertake in order to apply.

I decided to apply for the role of celebrity editor due to the fact that I get on famously (pun intended) with celebs. Like the time that myself and a friend followed Anton Du Beke around the Royal Albert Hall giggling, before requesting that he pick up my friend as if he was dancing with her. He did, in case you were wondering. Proof:
NOTE: Surprisingly, that's not her real face. I've edited it to protect her identity dignity.

No, honestly? I just really liked the look of the task to be celebrity editor and I love to interview people - I'm much better at listening to others talk about their lives than I am at talking about my own!

If you'd like to have a little look at my entry here it is, it might be a bit difficult to read so just click it to be taken to the website. The task was to suggest three cover girls for ELLE, justify your choices and choose three questions to ask them.

If anyone wants to 'like' or 'tweet' my entry I'd appreciate it so much, there's some stiff competition and I'd love for my entry to stand out to the judges. 

Are any of you guys going to enter? Let me know if you do - I'd love to read your entries!

That's all.

Tuesday, 5 June 2012


That’s right bitches, I’m staging my own French blog revolution.

In case you hadn’t noticed, this weekend is Jubilee weekend. I know, I know. You were wondering why you had an extra couple of days off work and what all that bunting over the place was about, weren’t you?  Well, it turns out the Queen has been sipping tea in her various palaces, happily reigning over us for a whole SIXTY years!  I know, right? Who knew!?

Anyway, not one to go sailing down the River Thames with the crowd, my blog theme this month is Parisian Chic. Yeah, I’m so hipster and alternative like that…

I’m not going to lie, I feel like a bit of a mug now. When I decided on the theme of this month this whole, tiny jubilee malarkey might have casually slipped my mind and I was caught up in the fact that I’m going to France. So, in my excitement, I hastily themed my blog without considering the fact that everyone would be feeling oh-so patriotic right around now and would probably not want to be reading about our stylish, froggy neighbours.

Well, I’ve made my French-themed bed and now I’m going to lie in it. I’m sure you’re all bored of jubilee themed blog posts in any case, right? (That’s my argument and I’m sticking to it.)
So here’s my French themed wishlist of the moment:

1. Cezanne Apple Pullover, The Orphan’s Arms £30 – Ahhhh suddenly I don’t feel quite so much of a traitor! The Orphan’s Arms are a quintessentially British company. I have a whole lotta love for this brand, over the winter I lived in my ‘London School of Sorcery’ sweater and I love this one just as much. All their stuff is incredible and very reasonably priced too – win!

2. Opium by Yves Saint Laurent, Debenhams £46 – There was a sample of this in Glamour a couple of months back and I fell in love with it. When my Jimmy Choo perfume runs out this will be the next purchase for me, I think.

3. Amour Pendant, Accessorize £10 – This is really cute. And French. Enough said.

4. French Manicure Set, Nails Inc £25 – Like the rest of the universe, I’m all about the nail art at the moment. But sometimes, when I’ve been sitting in the living room for hours creating ridiculous patterns on my nails and suffocating myself with nail polish fumes, I tend to think “WHY THE HELL AM I SPENDING SO MUCH TIME ON THIS?”, and just wish my nails were normal. That reason alone is why I need the Nails Inc French Manicure collection.

5. Chanel Briefcase, Rewind Vintage £2100 - Let’s face it; no French themed wishlist would be complete without a bit of Chanel. Although, as much as I love to lust over designer bags, the idea of ever spending that amount of money on a bag is absolutely ludicrous - I can’t quite believe people do it!

So, that’s my feeble attempt to do a French themed blog post on the most British week of the year. I won’t cry myself to sleep over this, what with the Olympics coming up there will be plenty more opportunities this year to embrace my patriotic side.

Special shout out to the Queen, because I know she’s reading this. Happy Jubilee, bbz. I apologize for my brief moment of ignorance when deciding on a theme this month. Hope we’re still cool.

Lots of love,
(Those are French kisses. Ha ha. Get it? Yeah.)

Sunday, 3 June 2012


It seems that someone has acquired my old blogspot link (Fashion felines) and is copying my posts and publishing others about tattoos.

I think these posts may be appearing on the dashboard of followers of my old blog as they are coming up on my dashboard. My advice here is DO NOT CLICK on any posts that come up under the name 'fashion-felines'. I'm not sure whether they're just trying to sell something or the links are dangerous.

I'm going to try and contact blogger and see whether they can sort this out. I really don't know why or how this has happened.

Apologies for any confusion.