Sunday, 20 May 2012

Review/Rant: CJG for Topshop

Kate Moss. Celia Birtwell. Barbara Hulanicki. All pretty big names that are well established in the fashion world, right? Topshop are renowned for working with the most established designers in the bizz.“Well, who is this elusive CJG then?” I hear you cry! “Is she a French couture designer? A famous supermodel, looking to branch out into design?” Well no, not exactly.

When doing my daily browse of the Topshop website the other day, I was quite surprised to be greeted by this picture:


“I KNOW THAT FACE!”, I thought, “SHE’S THE ONE WHO DATED THE GAY GUY OFF OF MADE IN CHELSEA AND THEN GOT SCARED OFF BY HIS PSYCHO EX-GIRLFRIEND"

They've broken up now. She can do better than a man with that jacket in any case.


This, folks, is Chloe Green. Ring a bell? She played a minor part in series two of ‘Made In Chelsea’ but is better known for being the daughter of multi-gazillionaire Topshop mogul, Phillip Green.Wonder how she landed the deal, huh?

If I'm honest, I’m a bit bewildered by this decision to allow Chloe to have her own collection in Topshop. It seems strange because the Topshop brand is a whole lot bigger than the Green family. The Topshop bosses have done an incredible job over the years of creating a brand that girls aspire to buy from, by working with established names in the industry and having their price tags slightly higher than their high street competitors – essentially making you feel like when you buy from Topshop, you’re buying from the best.

Now if I were Phillip Green, Lord of all good fashion chains… and Wallis, and my daughter had been pestering me about having her own shoe collection, I would probably have just given her a shelf in Miss Selfridge or Dorothy Perkins to play around with and hope that it’d keep her distracted for a little while. But no, by the looks of it Phil just went “Whatever you want, sugarpuff” and decided to give his daughter a big ol’ slice of the Topshop cash cow cake… thing. Might have mixed metaphors there a bit.

Personally, I’ve lost a tad of respect for the brand after this stunt. To me, their hard earned reputation as an ‘exclusive’ high street brand has been tainted by the decision to allow Green’s daughter to have her own collection. Obviously this is a case of it’s not what you know, it’s who you know. Or, in this case, who your Daddy is. This is made perfectly obvious on the Topshop website where Chloe discusses the design process for her collection. It’s truly riveting stuff, take a look:


I think my favourite part of this is “200 strong shoe collection of her own” as if to say,"Hey look, she’s never been to fashion school or designed a thing before, but the girl has alotta shoes, okay?"
So apparently all it takes to be qualified to design a collection for Topshop nowadays is to have a natter with your mates about shoes, create a Pinterest board featuring some heels and own a fair few pairs yourself. Well, I eagerly await my call, Topshop - I am officially qualified for the job.

And that’s not the only irritating thing about the whole situation. Have you seen the prices these shoes? 

Louisa Chain Booties
These retail at £175. One hundred and seventy five of your English pound sterling. It’s as if they’ve just said “How can we show that Chloe Green is a serious designer? ...I KNOW! Let’s slap a massive price tag on it!” To be honest, I wouldn’t even wear those if I were working the street out of fear of looking too tacky. And I’m from Essex – land of tack.

I feel like I’ve been a bit of a ranting little witch in this post, so I’m going to try to end on a slightly more positive note. In fairness to the girl, they’re not all as awful as those above. I might even go so far as to say I sort of like these pairs… sort of:

Bella Bea and Magda

And they’re a far more reasonable (ahem) £150. Bargain! Not that I could ever wear them - I’d break my ankle before even stepping out of the house.

Oh, and if you’re wondering about the mint soles on the shoes, her name’s Green. Get it? Chloe Green? Hence the mint green soles? Genius. Pat on the back for whoever came up with that idea.

Anyway, in case I left any doubt in your mind, I won’t be buying any of the CJG collection. 

That’s it. I’m all sarcasmed out for one day.

What do you think of the CJG collection? Do you think that Chloe should have been allowed her own collection in Topshop?

Ta ta.


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